HEAVEN OR HELL?

HEAVEN OR HELL?

You told me many times, my love
That you'd come back home
When men walked on the Moon!
Or Indians lived in Rome;
You said you'd return to me
"When Hell freezes over!"
Well, darlin', let me tell you
All about my lover.

He may not walk on the Moon
But he's racing through my heart
And though it's snowing up in Nome
And we are so far apart;
We share the same hobbies
Dogsledding is our sport
Hell isn't frozen yet, but
I'm holding down the fort.

He'll be back tonight with gifts
And in my waiting arms
He'll be happy and content
Because of all my charms;
You used to love me once a month
Instead of every single day
But we just can't get enough
So now it's twice on Sunday.

Now men have been on the Moon
And Indians visit Rome
It's hot as Heaven with my guy
Frozen Hell when you were home;
I've nails to paint and wine to pour
'Cause baby's almost here
He'll be kissing my sweet lips
But you may kiss my rear!