SURPRISE!
She had been dreaming and was not happy to awake to the ringing of a doorbell. Seldom did she nap after church but once she had removed her suit and stockings, she had laid down on top of her unmade bed to rest. She must have fallen asleep, the afternoon sun settling on top of her head. As in a trance, she stumbled into the hall to go downstairs just as the bell rang again.
"Mrs. Grayson?" he asked as she nodded yes. "I'm afraid I have some bad news; may we step inside?"
What seemed like hours later, though it couldn't have been more than 20 minutes, she still felt like he had kicked her in the stomach. Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined losing her husband in a bus accident. He was just 33 and healthy, an athlete who played Pro football.
When he had left over a week ago, he blew her a kiss from the taxi which carried him to the stadium to catch the bus. She could still see his handsome face, smiling as he spoke with the taxi-driver, an older black gentleman who remembered him from High School sports in their hometown.
As the officials asked if they could call anyone before leaving her alone with her grief, she offered the phone to call her parents in Denver. Until they arrived, as she knew they would, she just wanted to be left alone.
Many tears later, she returned the telephone to its hook and it immediately began to ring. She let the answering machine pick up and when it did so, she heard the greeting answer in her husband’s voice. And the sobs began anew......."Oh my God", she moaned "it can't really be true!"
The funeral was a blur; she let his family take charge and it was held in the stadium downtown. She wore a black tailored suit with her hair pulled back in a chignon and no make-up or
jewelry. When she saw the pictures in the newspapers, she hardly recognized herself. She seemed to have aged overnight and at just 29, she knew she looked more like 50. She felt as if she was 85.
Her boss was very generous with time off and so she basically slept in very late, ate little and kept the answering machine on. At least she could hear Dan's rich voice again. Soon, the only people calling were her parents and her best friend, Jane. Every night, Jane brought dinner over and picked up the wet towels and dirty clothes to take home with her to wash and dry. Jane's husband was away in Iraq and she liked to be needed. And Liz really appreciated it but just wanted to be left alone to remember the love of her life, her Danny.
The newspapers and TV paid many tributes to his sports career and she watched and read every article and piece. He had a wonderful career ahead of him and they had planned to have children but he wanted them to wait. She was married to him for 5 years when she begged him to start their family; he just was never ready. How she wished she had his sperm frozen in case something happened to him; all she wanted now was his son.
She hadn't bathed in 2 days and had lost 7 pounds when she had to return to her job as a court stenographer. She stood under the hot water, showering and washing her hair. Dressing in a plain, dark tailored pantsuit, she opened the garage door for the first time since the funeral 2 months ago, and drove to the courthouse. The Judge, her boss, welcomed her with a big hug and she entered the courtroom to concentrate as best she could.
This went on for almost 3 weeks when she was shocked once again. Her life was spent working and then going straight home to watch old reruns of movies she and Dan had watched together. Then, before bedtime she would watch old training clips of him on the football field. Many nights, she slept right there in front of the huge screen, awaking to the rooster crowing next door. Her eyes were constantly red and bloodshot.
So on this particular evening, she tried to ignore the front doorbell but they wouldn't go away. She peeked out the peephole to see a woman standing outside in the rain, an umbrella over her head. As she opened the door a bit, the woman pushed past her and it was then she saw the infant in her arms.
"Liz, I am sorry to intrude but we need to talk."
"I'm sorry but I have spoken to all the sports reporters I ever want to and......."
"No, no; I'm not with any newspaper. My name is Alex and I must explain why I'm here tonight. May I sit down?"
As soon as she sat down, the baby began to scream and she tried her best to quiet it. But it only screamed louder. She undid her raincoat and blouse and offered a full nipple to her hungry baby. Liz watched, fascinated, envying her this special gift, wishing it was her baby.
"Why are you here, if not to interview me about my Dan's death?"
She squirmed in her chair as she nursed her infant girl. She looked pale but very beautiful and had the body of a model. In fact, that's what she was, a model. "I live in NY but summer here in Maine. We are on our way back to Manhattan tonight on a late flight. This won't take long."
Liz sat down and looked at her and waited. She couldn't imagine what it might be. Would she be asking for money for some reason? A benefit? A fundraiser?
"You have no idea why I'm here, do you? I can tell by the look on your face. I almost wish I didn't have to tell you."
Liz waited, her breathing shallow and her eyes questioning.
"This child's father was your husband."
SURPRISE!
"What!! How do you mean?" She felt all the blood drain from her body.
"I met Dan when we both did a shoot for Sports Illustrated early last year. I knew he was married but I didn't know I'd fall in love with him. Danni was born just 3 months ago, the day after his funeral. He was going to be there for the birth........"
"You're lying! You're here to get support money from me! Get out of my home!!" She went to the door but Alex stayed seated, long tanned legs crossed at the abkles.
"I don't want your money; I make more than Dan and you put together. I want nothing but for Danni to know her grandparents, her Aunts and Uncles, her cousins."
"Get out! Now!" She knew she was screaming and the whole neighborhood could hear but she continued to scream until the car had driven off into the night.
Falling to the floor, she felt as if she had just been told of his death again. She sobbed until she frightened herself and crawled up onto the huge sofa. That's where she was when Jane found her after the Courthouse called looking for her to come in to work. It was almost 11 am the following day.........
Three cups of coffee later, she still couldn't tell Jane what had happened. Jane gave her one of her own valium and put her to bed. She checked back at 3 pm but she was still sleeping. The poor thing had not eaten since yesterday and looked totally shaken and destroyed. What could it be?
No-one heard from Liz for over a week. She just disappeared into thin air. When she returned, she was very thin and quite pale. She said she had to get away and think; she went back to work; but she just wasn’t ever the same employee and she resigned after 3 weeks.
When she heard that her in-laws had been informed of their new grandchild, she waited to hear what they would do. She wasn’t surprised when they embraced baby Danni. It wasn’t the baby’s fault that Dan had betrayed her, had killed whatever feelings Liz had left after his early death.
She could not trust men after that and knew she should go into therapy and get some help. But she decided to move to England and work there in the judicial system. It wasn’t long before she was in law school and then accepted a Judge appointment. She worked without dating for a dozen years and never returned to the USA.
She had a boyfriend for awhile but just could not trust him and never believed a word he said. She adopted a child and they lived in the country with a dog and some chickens. She laughed with them and volunteered for the homeless but her broken heart never healed.
Danni’s mother sued for half of Dan’s estate and life insurance and won; Liz had no comment to the Press. To her, Dan had never existed inside her heart and mind; he was a memory she buried along with his body.
She had been dreaming and was not happy to awake to the ringing of a doorbell. Seldom did she nap after church but once she had removed her suit and stockings, she had laid down on top of her unmade bed to rest. She must have fallen asleep, the afternoon sun settling on top of her head. As in a trance, she stumbled into the hall to go downstairs just as the bell rang again.
"Mrs. Grayson?" he asked as she nodded yes. "I'm afraid I have some bad news; may we step inside?"
What seemed like hours later, though it couldn't have been more than 20 minutes, she still felt like he had kicked her in the stomach. Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined losing her husband in a bus accident. He was just 33 and healthy, an athlete who played Pro football.
When he had left over a week ago, he blew her a kiss from the taxi which carried him to the stadium to catch the bus. She could still see his handsome face, smiling as he spoke with the taxi-driver, an older black gentleman who remembered him from High School sports in their hometown.
As the officials asked if they could call anyone before leaving her alone with her grief, she offered the phone to call her parents in Denver. Until they arrived, as she knew they would, she just wanted to be left alone.
Many tears later, she returned the telephone to its hook and it immediately began to ring. She let the answering machine pick up and when it did so, she heard the greeting answer in her husband’s voice. And the sobs began anew......."Oh my God", she moaned "it can't really be true!"
The funeral was a blur; she let his family take charge and it was held in the stadium downtown. She wore a black tailored suit with her hair pulled back in a chignon and no make-up or
jewelry. When she saw the pictures in the newspapers, she hardly recognized herself. She seemed to have aged overnight and at just 29, she knew she looked more like 50. She felt as if she was 85.
Her boss was very generous with time off and so she basically slept in very late, ate little and kept the answering machine on. At least she could hear Dan's rich voice again. Soon, the only people calling were her parents and her best friend, Jane. Every night, Jane brought dinner over and picked up the wet towels and dirty clothes to take home with her to wash and dry. Jane's husband was away in Iraq and she liked to be needed. And Liz really appreciated it but just wanted to be left alone to remember the love of her life, her Danny.
The newspapers and TV paid many tributes to his sports career and she watched and read every article and piece. He had a wonderful career ahead of him and they had planned to have children but he wanted them to wait. She was married to him for 5 years when she begged him to start their family; he just was never ready. How she wished she had his sperm frozen in case something happened to him; all she wanted now was his son.
She hadn't bathed in 2 days and had lost 7 pounds when she had to return to her job as a court stenographer. She stood under the hot water, showering and washing her hair. Dressing in a plain, dark tailored pantsuit, she opened the garage door for the first time since the funeral 2 months ago, and drove to the courthouse. The Judge, her boss, welcomed her with a big hug and she entered the courtroom to concentrate as best she could.
This went on for almost 3 weeks when she was shocked once again. Her life was spent working and then going straight home to watch old reruns of movies she and Dan had watched together. Then, before bedtime she would watch old training clips of him on the football field. Many nights, she slept right there in front of the huge screen, awaking to the rooster crowing next door. Her eyes were constantly red and bloodshot.
So on this particular evening, she tried to ignore the front doorbell but they wouldn't go away. She peeked out the peephole to see a woman standing outside in the rain, an umbrella over her head. As she opened the door a bit, the woman pushed past her and it was then she saw the infant in her arms.
"Liz, I am sorry to intrude but we need to talk."
"I'm sorry but I have spoken to all the sports reporters I ever want to and......."
"No, no; I'm not with any newspaper. My name is Alex and I must explain why I'm here tonight. May I sit down?"
As soon as she sat down, the baby began to scream and she tried her best to quiet it. But it only screamed louder. She undid her raincoat and blouse and offered a full nipple to her hungry baby. Liz watched, fascinated, envying her this special gift, wishing it was her baby.
"Why are you here, if not to interview me about my Dan's death?"
She squirmed in her chair as she nursed her infant girl. She looked pale but very beautiful and had the body of a model. In fact, that's what she was, a model. "I live in NY but summer here in Maine. We are on our way back to Manhattan tonight on a late flight. This won't take long."
Liz sat down and looked at her and waited. She couldn't imagine what it might be. Would she be asking for money for some reason? A benefit? A fundraiser?
"You have no idea why I'm here, do you? I can tell by the look on your face. I almost wish I didn't have to tell you."
Liz waited, her breathing shallow and her eyes questioning.
"This child's father was your husband."
SURPRISE!
"What!! How do you mean?" She felt all the blood drain from her body.
"I met Dan when we both did a shoot for Sports Illustrated early last year. I knew he was married but I didn't know I'd fall in love with him. Danni was born just 3 months ago, the day after his funeral. He was going to be there for the birth........"
"You're lying! You're here to get support money from me! Get out of my home!!" She went to the door but Alex stayed seated, long tanned legs crossed at the abkles.
"I don't want your money; I make more than Dan and you put together. I want nothing but for Danni to know her grandparents, her Aunts and Uncles, her cousins."
"Get out! Now!" She knew she was screaming and the whole neighborhood could hear but she continued to scream until the car had driven off into the night.
Falling to the floor, she felt as if she had just been told of his death again. She sobbed until she frightened herself and crawled up onto the huge sofa. That's where she was when Jane found her after the Courthouse called looking for her to come in to work. It was almost 11 am the following day.........
Three cups of coffee later, she still couldn't tell Jane what had happened. Jane gave her one of her own valium and put her to bed. She checked back at 3 pm but she was still sleeping. The poor thing had not eaten since yesterday and looked totally shaken and destroyed. What could it be?
No-one heard from Liz for over a week. She just disappeared into thin air. When she returned, she was very thin and quite pale. She said she had to get away and think; she went back to work; but she just wasn’t ever the same employee and she resigned after 3 weeks.
When she heard that her in-laws had been informed of their new grandchild, she waited to hear what they would do. She wasn’t surprised when they embraced baby Danni. It wasn’t the baby’s fault that Dan had betrayed her, had killed whatever feelings Liz had left after his early death.
She could not trust men after that and knew she should go into therapy and get some help. But she decided to move to England and work there in the judicial system. It wasn’t long before she was in law school and then accepted a Judge appointment. She worked without dating for a dozen years and never returned to the USA.
She had a boyfriend for awhile but just could not trust him and never believed a word he said. She adopted a child and they lived in the country with a dog and some chickens. She laughed with them and volunteered for the homeless but her broken heart never healed.
Danni’s mother sued for half of Dan’s estate and life insurance and won; Liz had no comment to the Press. To her, Dan had never existed inside her heart and mind; he was a memory she buried along with his body.
